Having sex in exchange for money means that someone offers you money to have sex with him or that you pay someone to have sex with you. It is not illegal to receive money for sex as long as you stick to certain rules.

Sex work is not against the law

If you pay for sex, you are the customer of a sex worker. In the Netherlands, paying someone for sex or receiving money in exchange for sex (sex work, prostitution) is not against the law as long as the following conditions are met. Customers are not punishable as long as the person who offers sex meets the following conditions:  

• Over 18 years old: the one who offers sex must be older than 18. It is against the law to have sex with minors in exchange for money.
• EU citizen or residence permit: if you are going to offer sex for money, you must be a citizen of an EU member state or be in possession of a Dutch residence permit. 

These conditions always hold, even if you have sex for money only once. But of course they also hold if you work as an escort or payboy on a regular or professional basis. 

Paying for sex

Do you want to pay someone to have sex with you? Keep in mind the following tips and stick to the following rules to keep the sex for yourself and for the escort, payboy or prostitute both legal and pleasurable:

• No sex with minors
• Respect his desires and boundaries. The fact that you are paying him for sex does not mean he has to do everything you want.
• Make clear agreements in advance. Discuss what you do and do not want to do and for which price. Keep any agreements you make.
• Always use condoms if you fuck or get fucked. STIs and HIV are more frequent among male sex workers. If he offers to fuck or get fucked without a condom, remember that you are not the only one he has offered that to.
• Watch out for alcohol and drugs. Don’t drink too much and be careful with drugs (chems).   

Getting paid for sex 

While you are out at bars or clubs, in chat rooms or on dating sites, men may offer you money for sex. That could happen even if you are not offering yourself as a payboy or escort. Whatever you might call yourself, if you have sex in exchange for money or valuable things, you are working as a sex worker.  

In other words, it is not a matter of how often you get paid to have sex. Always keep in mind the following tips:

• Keep your personal information private. Don’t give customers your real name, address, telephone number and/or personal email address, since they might pass on your information to others.
• Call in advance. If you have met someone via the Internet, call him on a telephone before you agree to meet with him. If he doesn’t want to answer the phone or doesn’t want to talk to you, be careful.
• Make agreements. Discuss the price in advance with your customer and what you will and will not do for that price. Keep to the agreements you made, even if he insists on fucking without a condom or offers you more money to do that. 
• If in doubt, don’t go any further. Do you feel unsafe or uncomfortable? Don’t agree to meet with him or leave if you are already with him. 
• Tell someone you can trust. Be sure to tell a friend (male or female) the name of the person you have agreed to meet and where you will meet him. Call that friend if anything goes wrong.
• Always use condoms. Always use a condom whenever a customer fucks you (when you are the bottom) and whenever you fuck him (when you are the top). Condoms prevent the transmission of HIV and reduce the risk of getting STIs.